Vengeance II

I'm feeling... better today... I suppose.

So, I guess I'll tell you about what happened.

The Second, Harold and I worked out a plan to get at The Rake. Finding it wouldn't be hard apparently. In fact The Second seemed rather adamant that it would be more than willing to let us find it. Or at least let him and I find it. Apparently it hates him and it loves it when people try to get revenge. According to The Second it finds it much more fun to kill vengeance seekers. So, finding it wouldn't be the problem. The problem would be killing it. Without the pocket Watch only The Brute had any real chance of putting it down for good since The Second's powers were limited. It was a little depressing knowing that I'd have no real role in this plan short of possibly a distraction. I really really wanted to be the one to end The Rake's life, or existence or whatever, but I guess that's not really impossible. Without the pocket watch I'm just an average human with weird dreams.

So, first step let the Rake know we're coming for it at which point it will likely hole up somewhere and wait for us.

That part was easy. The Second went on a killing spree finding and massacring a number of The Rake's servants. I wasn't aware The Rake had servants until now. They'd never really featured in any of my dreams before. Anyway the murders sent a message loud and clear and The Rake responded with a massacre of it's own. It brutally slaughtered a family in a town near here. It was a response telling us where it was. There was another massacre near the first one. Police think it's a serial killer and I guess technically it is. So, we knew where he was and we were prepared to go get him. The Second called in his proxy group and pinpointed where The Rake was likely to be hiding out.

The plan was The Second and his proxies would fight The Rake. They wouldn't win, but they hoped they could at least weaken it enough that Harold and The Brute could finish the job. The Proxies led the way. They had guns and little else. I'm not actually sure they knew what they were after and that they were committing suicide by following the orders they were given. It's possible though. Servants can be incredibly, stupidly loyal from what I've seen.

I was given a gun as well and we waited. I wasn't too surprised, but a little disturbed when the first sound was a scream of pain and probably death before the sound of gun fire erupted. That's when The Second and I were supposed to go in. Technically I wasn't ever really supposed to go in anytime. The Second didn't much care what I did, but I chose to go in with him. I refused to just do nothing. The place was a house. Currently for sale and unowned. It was two stories and a basement with three bedrooms. A nice place, it was a shame after what happened there it's unlikely it would sell.

We found the bodies of two of the proxies on the middle floor and gunfire was coming from upstairs. I would of expected the basement, but apparently not. We rushed upstairs to see two halves of a proxy fly out of the bedroom at the top of the stairs and the gunfire ceased shortly after. The Second summoned one of those black knives that he'd used against Muffin and rushed into the master bedroom and I followed. Bodies were strewn around the room and The Rake was holding the last one in the air impaled through the gut on it's claws. It tossed it aside as The Second rushed it and his knife was caught by one of the claws as the other slashed at The Second's face. The Second seemed to vanish and then was behind The Rake and managed to stab the knife into The Rake's throat who reacted simply by roaring angrily and tossing itself backwards, smashing him against a wall. I took this opportunity to fire three rounds into it's chest.

I should probably inform you here. I'm not a violent person. I won't kill another human being or most animals. Or I guess I mostly try not to. That does not mean I don't know how to kill things. When I was with The Ordeal they taught me how to shoot. Theo and I would do target practice on occasion for fun. Regardless of whether I wanted to or not The Ordeal thought it important I knew how to fight in case I needed to. It was a skill all The Ordeal members were taught. So, The Rake being a horrific monster and knowing my bullets wouldn't kill it I had no problem hitting it in the chest. The Rake let out an angry howl and completely forgot about the Second instead coming barreling towards me. I emptied the remainder of my 8 bullet clip into it's face doing little, but piss it off and then flung myself backwards out of the room in an attempt to dodge I landed on my back, watched as it hit the door frame with it's shoulder's barely slowing as it broke through and then was hit against the wall with a force like a train by The Brute. I took this opportunity to reload.

The Brute held The Rake against the wall as The Rake struggled to get free. The contest didn't last long before The Rake managed to push The Brute back and then seemed to try and disappear apparently not liking the odds anymore. However as it began to disappear either into it's domain or into the Godsway whichever The black knife still embedded in it's neck began to glow and The Rake let out a howl as black electricity began to arc over it's body. It howled and The Second tackled it from the side brought it to the ground and stabbed two more knives into it's body before being slammed against the wall. It managed to get up and turn to catch The Brute's next attack. The Brute's arms met The Rake's claws and they stood tensed against each other. The black coloured electricity continued arcing through The Rake's body as it continued trying to escape. They stood locked in a frozen struggle for a few moments before The Rake began pushing The Brute back. It took a step forward forcing The Brute back and so I shot it in the leg. It's leg buckled and The Brute surged back forward tossing The Rake to the ground and then held it down by the arms and slammed it's head into The Rake's. What was possibly lava began to pour from The Brute's hands burning away The Rake's arms as it began to shriek in pain and hopefully, fear.

It's arms were soon engulfed in flames and melted away from it's body at which point The Brute lifted it's arms and then brought them down still dripping lava onto The Rake's face. Repeatedly raining lava covered hammer blows on The Rake's face until eventually The Rake stopped struggling. By that point however The Rake also didn't have much of a head. The Second carefully moved to examine The Rake's body as The Brute sat atop his defeated opponent triumphantly. The Second nodded to me.

The Rake was dead.

I wasn't sure how to feel.

I was happy that The Rake was dead. I didn't feel wrong about killing it. I still felt hollow though. Unsatisfied. I didn't feel like I had actually avenged Lisa in this way. Her killer was dead, but we weren't done.

Unfortunately before I could formulate my thoughts on the matter anymore something bad happened. The Brute suddenly began I guess absorbing The Rake's power. The Second tried to stop him, but The Brute simply turned and grabbed him tossing him down the hallway and into the room at the opposite end of The Hall. Harold stepped up the stairs as The Brute finished absorbing The Rake's power and Harold pointed past me and The Brute leaped over me and bounded into the room after The Second.

"what the hell are you doing?" I asked horrified.

"Killing another monster," Harold answered casually.

"I order you to stop!" I ordered.

"What? You don't get to order me!" he responded angrily. I backpedaled quickly.

"Sorry! But don't do this!"

"Why not?"

"It's wrong,"

"How he's a monster!"

"But he helped us!"

"That doesn't stop him from being a monster,"

"Maybe it does,"

"How so?"

"Well what about you? You're pretty much just like him,"

"I am not! He kills indiscriminately to get what he wants. He sacrificed those proxies for this. He doesn't care about anyone, but himself! Even your girlfriend. The only reason he's bothered by her death is because it upset him,"

"The same goes for you," I answered and his eyes locked on mine with hatred. My mind desperately told me to backpedal again, but I didn't.

"What happened in the past doesn't count. I wasn't myself the-" he began, but I cut him off.

"-Were you yourself when you saved me from The Liar?" I asked.

"Yes and so what. I killed a monster, the same as I just did now and you aren't complaining about that. Is The Liar another special case like The Second apparently is,"  he asked with a sneer.

"No, but you didn't just kill The Liar. You killed Amy. The girl who's body The Liar was using. Don't pretend you didn't know that, she made a point of it. Your response was 'Don't care,'" I informed him.

He raised his head, "A host of The Dying Man is already dead it was a mercy kill," he responded.

"That's not true and you know it. The Liar doesn't decay her hosts or even damage their minds. Amy was just fine, buried inside of herself,"

"There was no way to rescue her anyway..." he responded though he sounded uncertain.

"There was. You know that too. You were watching what was happening. You knew about the fight going on back at The Ordeal. You probably knew about Richard. You might not have known that he could save her, but you didn't even try,"

"Alright, fine I fucked up!" He yelled at me, "but that doesn't change anything. This one is a monster and deserves it!"

"Maybe he does maybe he doesn't! It's not your place to decide who lives or dies and even if he does deserve to die, there's no reason to kill him now right after he helped us. You want to be a hero, use the power of The Brute to save humanity and fight back against The Fears. This isn't how a Hero should be," I countered.

He sagged, "What do you want me to do then? Just give up this power, start a protest?"

"No. Keep the power, but use it to protect people not just to kill those you decide deserve it,"

"What do you mean?"

"Well... We killed The Rake and you're probably strong enough to stand up to a Fear right?" He nodded, "Then help me get the pocket watch back. Help me fulfill my mission and I'll help you fulfill yours. Best part, I'll need you to help me kill The Faceless Bastard," I informed him. He smiled.

"I can definitely help with that," he responded then closed his eyes, "I've stopped The Brute and The Second has escaped. We should leave now," he said. I nodded.

We left together.

That was about two days ago now. I've been simultaneously making plans and thinking about Lisa.

I don't think I'll ever be over her and I don't know if I ever want to get over her. I do however know that I won't be satisfied at all until I've fully avenged her. The only way I know how to do that is to fulfill my mission.

As such we're going after The Wooden Girl and Ariadne and getting The Pocket Watch back.

"

Vengeance

It's been a while since I've posted anything and I hope you'll understand why. A lot has happened though and I should fill you in. We got to the hospital, Harold and I. What The Grotesque showed me turned out to be true. We arrived to find that Lisa had apparently passed away in the night. According to the doctor's her heart had just stopped. Now it's technically possible that The Rake had nothing to do with this. That is entirely possible. It's also not true. I know it... I know it in my heart and what happened later confirmed it.

I spent a day or so, just sitting around mourning and wondering what would happen to Lisa. I don't know if she has any family and she never had any real identification on her. I know her real name, but we checked her into the hospital initially as Lisa Siles and never really remembered to correct that, besides doing so would likely raise all kinds of questions.

Actually a rather humorous question popped into my head at one point. Amid all the heartbroken, depressed sobbing sometimes you get a few moments where something that's just absurd occurs and you have to laugh in between tears. In my case it was that despite being brought in with no identification and no money, the hospital didn't seem to care. I mean I have identification and a healthcare card so I wouldn't be a problem, but why did they continue caring for Lisa without cost. I did eventually get an answer to that and that's what I'm getting around to.

I kept myself to myself and Harold was nice enough to stay with me and so he was there when I made the decision to get revenge. I wasn't entirely sure how at the time, but I figured I had a Fear on my side so sure let's go fuck up The Rake to get revenge for Lisa. It was a stupid plan and probably would have been the end of my story very quickly if it wasn't for the fact someone was listening. As Harold tried to talk me down and explain that while The Brute is powerful it's not actually powerful enough to go toe to toe with any of the established Fears someone came and informed us they were and were willing to help.

That person being The Second.

See as I said I got an answer to my earlier question. After Archangel!Faceless injured Lisa, The Second got pissed and essentially broke off from the little alliance that had been arrayed against me. He had pulled some strings to get Lisa proper care and had covered the medical bills. At that time he still sought my death, but he didn't want Lisa hurt because of it. However with The Wooden Girl's betrayal I wasn't even a threat anymore and The Second had no personal desire for my death. However now that The Rake has killed Lisa The Second has a personal desire for The Rake's death and unfortunately this desire is not shared entirely by his other half who is apparently the same half kind of? The Slender Man basically gave him free reign to do what he wants, but with no help from his alternate self. A fact that The Slender Man has made sure everyone else in the Fear community knows. Therefore if The Second does attack The Rake it will apparently not be seen as a fight between The Slender Man and The Rake, but more like as if one of The Slender Man's agents just got it in his head one day to try and kill The Rake. The Slender Man will probably have to make some amends, but otherwise nothing would happen.

Basically with this scenario The Second had no chance. He has only about half of his normal power, a small group of Proxies with a grudge and that's it. However he feels working with Harold would at least give him a shot and so he is essentially enlisting Harold's help and by extension my help to kill The Rake.

Harold was much more on board with the idea now and we spent the rest of that day making plans.

I'd tell you the rest of what happened now, but I'm not really over Lisa's death and I doubt I ever will be and I don't feel well. I think I need a bit of rest. There's more to do soon anyway.

My greatest Nightmare

I had another grotesque Nightmare. It took me a while to gather up the courage to write anything afterwards. I woke up at 8:00 AM or so from my nightmare and just stayed in bed until now (Almost 1:00 PM) before I managed to bring myself to write anything or even get out of bed. It's stupid as every second I wait is more time before I find out what happened to Lisa... What really happened anyway...

That was what The Nightmare was. The Grotesque appeared in my dream and he was smiling.

"I see you're back in our world. That's good news for me. Couldn't mess with your dreams while you were in the city and I've greatly enjoyed our sessions. Today... or Tonight I should say I have something special for you. Let me answer the question currently on your mind. Then I was in the hospital. I was at Lisa's bedside. There were a bunch of Doctors standing around and Lisa seemed to be fine. The heart rate machine thing was beeping rhythmically and the doctors all seemed happy. I wondered at the time why The Grotesque was showing me this... until the Doctor's left. Lisa was doing well. She'd be fine in fact. That's the impression I got, but then I found out she wouldn't. The doctor's left and it was just me and her in the room. There were a number of beds, but only about 2 other patients both unconscious or asleep as well. There was a closet in the room and I found my attention suddenly drawn to it and a horrible premonition occurred to me. I began to cry and plead with The Grotesque not to show me this. Of course he didn't listen. The closet door opened and a clawed, beastly apparition stalked into the room. It was The Rake. It moved to the bed and the heart monitor began speeding up. Even comatose Lisa could feel The Rake's presence and she was panicking. It seemed to smile as it noticed this and it skittered onto the bed and rubbed a claw over her face.

"Be still now anomaly. Your nightmare has ended," The Rake whispered and the heart monitor began to slow and then flatlined. The nightmare ended then. Which is all it was... A nightmare... Just a nightmare. She can't be dead. Not like that. I'm gonna be arriving at the hospital soon and I'll see she's still alive...

Oh god please be still alive.

Ozymandias

So... I went out into the storm to see what was going on. Strong winds buffeted me and they were centered around what appeared to be a hole in the middle of the street. It was tiny barely a pinpoint, but very quickly it began to enlarge and soon clawed hands pushed through followed by tendrils of smoke that filtered out of the hole and then the head of The Brute pushed through and the hole widened into a sort of door and The entirety of The Brute stepped through with Harold following behind it. It glanced around hungrily and then it's eyes settled on her and it lunged only to be yanked back by means of the chain in Harold's hands.

"What are you doing here?" I asked and Harold smiled at me.

"Came to get you out," he answered.

"Oh well thanks... We should hurry then I'm pretty sure The City will-" I began and he cut me off.

"The City won't do anything. It's dead. All that's left here are the remnants of it. Nothing, but mindless ruins. The City disconnected itself from here when The Amalgam attacked. It came back for a bit to repay The Muffin Man, but it disconnected itself again later. This entire version of The Empty City is dead. Static. The Doors are set in their locations and only The Fears know where they are. The City is no longer unchanging and it no longer preys on people. It's simply old ruins," Harold explained.

"That... That doesn't seem right. It was providing for me. Normal, or dead cities can't do that," I argued.

"True. The city is dead, but in a sense it's powers remain to a degree. Someone either you, or The Fears, likely The Wooden Girl since she's the one behind you being here, used the remains of The Empty City's fluctuating nature to form whatever you desired. There is no mind left here, but The City can still change if someone else desires it to. It's like play-doh now, which in one way is good news as it's probably the only reason you're still alive, but in another way is bad news," He informed me.

"What's bad about it?" I asked.

"With The City dead and no servants of The City remaining there's only one source left for you to acquire it's essence for The Watch," He explained.

"You know about that?"

"Literally anything that is considered a Fear knows about that. Jack wasn't very careful about who got the message."

"Well fine... What's the one remaining source of The City's essence?"

"The Muffin Man. He contains within him The Essences of the The Empty City, The Slender Man, The Rake, The Wooden Girl, The Cold Boy, The Blind Man, EAT, The Plague Doctor and The Choir. Add to that The Convocation which you already have, The Archangel which you might have and The Dying Man and you have almost everything," he explained.

I sighed, "So at this point the only choice I have left is to kill one of my friends in order to complete this Key?" I asked.

He nodded, "Sorry."

"Is it actually worth it?" I asked.

"I think it is, but regardless of whether you think it is or not, The Wooden Girl probably knows The Muffin Man is the only source for The Empty City's essence as well, so whether at your hands or hers one of you is going to try and kill him for the essences he contains. Especially since The Wooden Girl would probably find it much easier to kill him and The Liar than to try and get it from The others who all oppose her plan and are actually currently pitted in battle with her now that as far as they know you're not a threat," He explained.

He was right of course. I sighed.

"Whatever I decide to do the first step is leaving here," I said.

He smiled, "Great. I'd be obliged if you stepped through first since it will likely close behind me and if we walk together The Brute is liable to try and take a bite out of you," he explained.

I did so. The other side of the door led to an alleyway and I stepped away from the door as Harold and The Brute came through at which point The Brute seemed to disappear into the ground again as the door closed behind them. I'm quite far away from The Hospital and my first step should probably be to go after The watch, but the first thing I told Harold is that he better get me to the hospital to find out how Lisa's doing. Harold got me a computer to type this post out, but it's not moveable. With any luck though I'll be able to get mine back from the hospital when we get there.

I really hope you're okay Lisa.

Good news, bad news.

Good news: I'm never gonna run out of food and never gonna not have access to a computer.

Bad News: I'm never getting out of here.

Every time I look around I find myself back at this street corner. The corner has within view: The Internet Cafe which takes only a toonie to get me access to my blog, a bank that seems to spit out toonies with a touch of a button and a grocery store that seems to restock every day. So, yeah not gonna die and not going to lose my internet access so I can keep you updated every day as I slowly age to death in this lonely street.

Something is happening... A storm appears to be growing and I can smell smoke. I... I guess I'll check it out... If I die at least I'll be out of here...

Betrayal

I went to see Sally at the new place. I found her suspended from the ceiling by strings. Strings crisscrossed the entire place like spiderwebs. I ran over to her and started trying to take her down when I felt a painful pinch on the back of my neck. I reached up and swatted a spider off of me and staggered back as she raised her head and grinned at me. The string's snapped and she fell to the ground, lowering her hand to the ground for the spider to crawl up onto her hand. "Don't worry it won't kill you," she told me as she went and retrieved her Didgeridoo case from the corner. She opened it and drew out the red spider dress and staff from within and proceeded to put on the dress as I managed to stumble back against the wall. My vision was getting blurry. "I could say I've actually grown a bit fond of you in our time together, which is the only reason I haven't killed you up till now and why I thought of a way to be rid of you without having to end your life. In fact two ways," she stated and then something slid out of the sleeve of her dress. It was The Pocket Watch.

"My mistress is a genius unlike the other fears. Sure if you release the creature it will probably destroy us. That's true, but if we kill you what will we do then? Take the watch and somehow try and stop The Man In Grey from taking it back and giving it to someone else just to do this all again? No. She figures that what The Fears should do is just take the pocket watch and release it themselves. The way she sees it if we release it it will probably be lenient on The Fears and merely go after Jack who none of us would have any hard feelings about seeing discomfited. The other's disagreed in their foolishness and were set on killing you. So, she'll carry her plan out by herself. Perhaps with even better results," Sally/Ariadne explained.

"Makes sense to me," I stated in a voice that to me sounded like someone who was seconds away from throwing up which was accurate, "What are you going to do with me now?"

"Well you get to choose. The first option. Join up? You'd make a wonderful Doll, I'm sure," she offered. I frantically shook my head which made me feel worse and I dropped to my knees, "Well then the other choice is that you go away somewhere were you can't become a problem for us ever again," she informed me. I tried to tell her that she could take her staff and go fuck herself with it and vow that I would find a way back and that I would kill her for this betrayal. However, it was at this point that I lost consciousness.

When I awoke I was in a city. There didn't seem to be anyone around. Ariadne, or whoever had actually brought me here since I doubt Ariadne would do it herself, had not seen fit to provide me with my laptop. Luckily there was an internet Cafe just up a side street. No one was there, but the computers worked and for just a single Toonie. I had internet access and amazingly, or at least it would be amazing if I didn't already figure out what was going on.  the internet browser loaded up my blog for me with me already signed in.

I'm pretty sure I'm in The Empty City... Or Silent Hill, but The Empty City seems more likely.

I figure I'm stuck here and I'll never find out whether Lisa is okay or not. I can't believe my story is going to end like this.

Release

I was allowed to leave today. Lisa is still being held here though. Which means I can't really leave this place as I

A. Won't leave without her.
B. Would not survive trying to move around on my own.

I rely on her for so much it's almost scary.

She's the one who fights, who finds resources and places to stay, to comfort me emotionally... She's the only reason I'm still alive at all. Sally hasn't been around since we were brought in. I remember her mentioning something about trying to find somewhere new for us to stay. There was a note from her with the... Er whatever the hospital version of a receptionist is. It was from Sally, but was apparently delivered by a man who I didn't recognize from the description given and who didn't give a name I recognized either. The note said that she had found a new place and that I should come to a certain address where she's made us a little home.

I'm writing this before going there as I just wanted to type something out now before I leave. I wanted to think of something other than what's going on, but it's not working.

Lisa is still alive, but that, "yet" epithet is starting to seem true. She has fallen again into unconsciousness and apparently "Complications" have arisen as the doctor's told me. I don't want to leave her side, but I can't stay. It's selfish, but I can't stand the idea of being here if she dies. I need to be somewhere else and have something else to do. So... I'm gonna go see Sally and then I'm gonna contact Muffin and gonna get him to help me get the Watch back.

Relief

So there's good news. After a grueling amount of time in which I was unable to find out anything regarding Lisa's condition I finally got an answer.

She is alive. At least for now. While the injury was pretty severe it was apparently nowhere near as severe as I remember it being. All that blood I remember seeing was apparently just the lens of terror making everything seem way more dire than it actually was. Either that or this is all a dream and I'm just finally catching a break on that fact. At the moment I don't care the point is she's not dead.

I mostly don't even care that they keep appending the word, "Yet" on the end every time they tell me that.

She actually managed to wake up for a little while apparently and communication was possible. She couldn't talk, though whether due to her injuries or the amount of bandages and other medical stuff, I'm not very knowledgeable about this kind of thing, around her throat. So we communicated through a small keyboard thing that allowed her to type out her thoughts and then converted them to speech.

I proceeded at first to tell her how glad I was she was alive and how much I'd miss her and all that and she only responded with the desire to tell me something that she considered rather urgent and I suppose it was... Still felt kind of cold her being all business about it.

I'll put it down to the situation. Her message though was regarding the feeling she'd had just before Faceless showed up.

She had mentioned that she could sense a Fear shortly before he arrived and amended that she's pretty sure what she was sensing wasn't Faceless. While The Convocation does nest inside of a Nest she was unable to sense the birds when The Timberwolves and Nests attacked us at the mall at least until they had been released. As such she should not of felt a Fear if only Faceless had attacked us. She thinks there might have been someone else there. I have a slightly different Theory.

Mostly I'm still fairly sure that's not Faceless and this might in fact confirm it. I'm pretty sure we were attacked by a Fear pretending to be Faceless.

One thought would be The Liar since she did possess him shortly before his death, but no that piece of her as well as his body were completely annihilated by Lightning. I think most likely the person who attacked us was The Archangel.

The Archangel manifests in the bodies of those who have died. Popular Theory holds that those in service to one of the others when they die don't go to him, but The Grinning Reaper stated otherwise when she was brought back to life. I feel that Faceless died and went to The Archangel and now he's using Faceless' body. It's probably why The Nests and Timberwolves are working together. The Nests might not be aware of this, The Timberwolves probably are. The Nests probably just think of him as some dual servant now serving both The Convocation and The Archangel. Perhaps there's something I can use there. Actually maybe I can confirm that... If that was The Archangel I obviously wasn't able to kill his body with The Pocket watch, but I might still of gotten some of it's essence.

... The Pocket Watch... I don't know where it is. The last time I remember having it was when I was hitting Faceless... or The Archangel, whichever with it. Everything after he left is a blur, but I don't really remember if I had it then either... Could he have stolen it. I asked a nurse and they said that there hadn't been a pocket watch on my person when they brought us in. Faceless/The Archangel must of stolen the pocket Watch.

This is bad... Very bad.

I still don't know what's real, but it doesn't matter.

If I let myself get hung up on what's real and what isn't I'll end up dead and Not!Faceless is wrong. The likelihood that this is all a dream is possible, but if it is it seems most likely that it's a coma dream and I'm fairly sure dying here dream or not would have negative consequences on the real me either dying or possibly being the symbolic sign of my body giving up in the real world so I'm not gonna just let myself die.

I'm gonna try not to think about what's real and just carry on this story to it's conclusion.

Actually there you go. It's a story Amanda. Dream or not it's a story and it's your job as the protagonist to make sure it ends happily. Just keep that in mind. You like stories and you hate downer endings. Don't let this one end on a downer.

Now then what to do about the other major problem facing me...

I can't succeed in this mission without killing people... Well maybe I can just tell Muffin or the others and give one of them the pocket watch. I mean nothing actually said I have to be the one using The pocket watch did they? It's worth a try? I'm... pretty sure just giving it to hold won't kill them anyway... Probably... The Liar grabbed it with no problem... I'm sure it wasn't just because it was her. I mean... Okay probably best not to test on my friends, but... I don't really want to test on anyone... This is infuriating. Still feeling sick as well btw, but aside from a bit of vomiting there's nothing else and I guess the good thing is if it is a dream it probably won't really affect me so I can safely ignore it.

Right... So... I know you aren't aware there was a massive pause just there, but it's been a little while between the last paragraph and this one. Mostly because we were just attacked. I was about to end the post and then Lisa yelled out she was sensing a Fear shortly before someone crashed through a window. It was Faceless. He crashed through the glass and stood up from the floor with pieces of glass embedded in his skin and immediately rushed at me. I managed to avoid getting decapitated by the machete by throwing myself out of my chair, however he caught me around the throat and slammed me down through the table. It hurt like hell and unfortunately caused the screen on my laptop to crack as it fell off the table. I can still use it, but the crack is annoyingly visible and blocks off most of the lower left corner of the screen.

Anyway so he's standing over me and Lisa rushes at him. He turns and slashes at her, but she fell back and slid under his legs before  turning and punching him in the lower back. He stumbled forward turned, tore one of the glass shards out of his arm and tossed it at her. It hit her in the throat and she began choking and fell over. I could see quite a bit of blood coming from her neck as she fell. I screamed and then he was on me. He was kneeling over me and his hand moved holding my head down as he moved The Machete the blade of it barely touching my throat.

"Real enough for you, Amanda?" he taunted and I pulled the pocket watch from my pocket and slammed it into his head. It didn't happen. Nothing happened. "Surprised? You can't death touch the dead," he explained and I could hear the smirk I was imagining on the mouth that would be all that was left of his face. I was going to die and I started panicking. I began desperately smashing the pocket watch against the side of his head knowing nothing would happen. He didn't even seem hurt by the constant smashing of a heavy metal watch against his temple. I felt the blade moving with an intense pain as it began to cut into my throat. I wanted to look at Lisa. I wanted her to be the last thing I saw, but his hand held my head forcing me to stare at his mask. It was then Sally rushed in. Her instrument case thrust in under his chin and then lifted tugging him off of me with I noticed more strength than it seemed. It was like he was almost yanked off of me. He stumbled back a bit than did some sort of complicated motion and there was a sound like snapping. I think he might have snapped one of his bones for some reason.

He looked at Sally then at me and then at Lisa and shrugged. "I suppose I've done enough for now," he stated with a shrug. Sally ran at him and he dashed to the window and jumped out again. I turned onto my stomach and crawled over to Lisa. She wasn't breathing... There was blood pooling out of her neck. "Call an ambulance," I croaked to Sally and she hesitated and in that moment I began to hate her. It's stupid, but that hesitation has made me hate her. She did call the ambulance though and I lay on the ground feeling unable to do any more than just hold my head against Lisa's side and cry.

Eventually the ambulance showed up and the rest is a blur. I woke up later in a hospital bed, my throat bandaged. Sally was there and she handed me the laptop. I'm not allowed to get up yet and I don't know if Lisa is okay... I don't know what I'll do if he killed her...

Now back to your normally scheduled horror.

I'm cracking jokes see... Everything is fine. No reason to worry about me.

The Grotesque is back in good form... I'll give him that much. It was a more normal grotesque nightmare as in it was certifiably a grotesque nightmare as opposed to the previous one resembling one of my prophetic dreams...

Er... I might be too paranoid for my own good as rereading that last sentence it appears that I have subconsciously just decided that my last nightmare had to of been The Grotesque messing with me and the return to normal form is likely just an attempt to make the dream seem more real... I... I like this idea, but I have no actual proof of that and I feel I may be cracking up a little.

After The Liar's explanation last time I've been feeling rather ill and part of me is wondering whether it's all in my head or whether this is the subtle work of The Plague Doctor. He wasn't mentioned in the meeting though it occurs to me now that the entire meeting might have been a Grotesque Nightmare. The Grotesque might never of left at all. All of the dreams I've had since the first nightmare, might have just been The Grotesque toying with me... Maybe all the dreams I've ever had. Maybe I never woke up at all.

That... That was the implication of The Grotesque's last nightmare anyway...

It seemed like the normal torture and pain route, but throughout it there were subtle voices telling me to wake up and I was remembering things that I don't remember now... People and Events that I've never seen or heard of. The Grotesque seemed alarmed and began actively reminding me of The People I do know and now I can't shake the feeling that this isn't real. That nothing is real.

I told the others and Lisa assured me she's real, but of course she would.

When you think about it it makes sense. In my dreams/nightmares, I have power and purpose and friends and family and I'm well I'm important. Everyone wants to be important. It's like an adventure. Maybe it's all fake. Maybe I'm in a coma or something. Maybe there is no Grotesque nightmare it's all just a comatose dream... I've been told that you can't dream in a dream, but I only remember being told that in the real world that as far as I know might be a dream.

I need a hug, but at the same time I can't stand to let anyone touch me. I just keep imagining them all disappearing as they touch me and I can't... I can't deal with it.

Is the real world the one I'm in right now where I have a magic pocket watch given to me by The Grim Reaper and am on a quest with my perfect girlfriend, who was once a part of an eldritch monster who is in love with her, to drain the essences from a bunch of eldritch monsters created by the devil in order to free some creature all while being aided by a psychopath named The Muffin Man, a computer who can manipulate bodies and a guy who may or may not be god?

Or is the real world a place with no magic where I'm just some unlucky sucker who was in some kind of accident and am now in a coma?

When you put it that way which seems more logical?

Had a conversation with The Liar today.

I woke up, from either a very very effective Grotesque nightmare or a prophetic dream of terrible things to come, to Lisa shaking me and telling me she sensed the presence of a Fear nearby. She was not exactly panicked, but very alarmed.

We checked on Sally who appeared to be asleep clutching her instrument case like it was a teddy bear and woke her up. We then tried to flee as quietly as possible. We didn't make it. We made use of a handy fire escape to leave and found The Liar waiting at the mouth of the alleyway for us. She was in a new body I didn't recognize and I only know it was The Liar cause she admitted so instantly. It was part of her initial greeting.

"Hey, Amanda! It's your friend Amy or you know The Liar. Heard you were in some trouble and decided to come make it worse. Lisa glanced around us probably wondering the same thing I was. Was there anything around we could use effectively as a ranged weapon so we wouldn't have to touch her if we needed to fight. The answer was, other than a garbage lid, no. She was watching us and smiled. "Oh don't worry I'm not going to kill any of you or make anyone die. At least I don't intend to do so. I just want to talk. Also I want to show you something," she moved then and before anyone could react she was standing directly in front of me, her hand shot out and grabbed my throat as her other hand moved to my pocket. Lisa stepped forward.

"Take another Step and I will be inside of her before you can blink," The Liar responded without looking away from my eyes. Her hand slipped into my pocket and then drew out The Pocket Watch. I don't know exactly what I was expecting. I wasn't sure if touching it would kill her or if I needed to be using it as a weapon or really I didn't know what it would do, but it did the last thing I was expecting. Nothing at all. She took it out and then let me go. I tried to grab for it, but she stepped back out of range and opened it.


"Give it back!" I demanded making another failed attempt to grab for it. She smiled and simply kept backing away finding great amusement in this apparently.

"You sure you want it back? I mean you really don't seem to enjoy using it," she taunted as she inspected it, "I see you got one already," she said and turned it to face me. I hadn't really checked it recently so this was a new development to me. The number 3 on the clock face was glowing.

"What... What is that?" I asked and she tossed it back to me.

"A key I suppose you could call it. More accurately it's the essence of a Fear. The puppet probably didn't count so I assume this is from the Nest," she looked at my blank face and smiled, "You have no idea what you're doing do you?" I shook my head and she laughed, "The Fears will hate me if I tell you, but they hate me anyway so why not," she moved again and put her arm around my neck. I could feel my skin crawling where she touched me.

"Jack told us Fears a few facts about that Watch and what it can do. The most important one and the reason most of The Fears are after you right now is it can act as a key to a gate that holds within it the most terrible creature of all. Something so terrible that The Fears are willing to side with Jack to stop you from freeing it, in order to free it however you'll need to collect The Essences of The Fears who Jack used initially to seal the gate. Which would normally mean you'd have to use that Watch on The Fears themselves which would be suicidal, but unfortunately for many of the Fears. Most of them put a small amount of their essence into their servants which isn't much, but is enough to make the key you need. You've already got some of The Convocation's essence in there so you just need the rest. In fact part of why I'm here is to give you another key and run a bit of an experiment. You'll need the essence of The Dying Man for that key and I'm willing to give it to you. All you have to do is kill me and my host with that Watch and you'll be one step closer to your goal," she explained and then stepped back and bowed her head.

"What... Why would I want to free this terrible creature?" I asked.

"Because it's your goal. It's what you're supposed to do. It's why you were given the watch and your dreams. The Man in Grey wants this creature freed and you are his agent to do it. Besides it's either do it and succeed or don't do it and eventually get killed by The Fears," she explained.

"So... This is my purpose?" I asked and she nodded. I gripped the pocket watch in my hand and advanced on her. Just as I was about to touch it to her however she raised her head. Her eyes fearful.

"Where am I? What's happening?" she asked in a scared voice, her eyes darting around wildly looking at me, Lisa and Sally, "What's going on?" she asked again sounding panicked. It was the host talking. The Liar had given control back to her host. It was how The Liar worked. Unlike most Dying Man shards The Liar preferred to remain hidden in her hosts allowing them control and only subtly manipulating their actions. Only occasionally would she take full control in which case the host would enter a state not unlike sleep and be unaware of what happened while she was dormant. She probably just woke up now finding herself somewhere unfamiliar and strange with no recollection of how she got here or why she was there. I felt sick and I staggered back. The frightened face immediately disappeared becoming a mocking smirk as The Liar regained control.

"I knew you wouldn't do it," she taunted.

"You're sick!" I screamed at her.

"You make a fine agent of Death. Unwilling to kill. You're weak. I knew all along you're nothing to fear. You'll never be able to fill your purpose in fact here have a free tip. If you could bring yourself to do it, your friend Muffin contains within him the essence of almost every Fear. If you used the Watch on him you'd pretty much be done. You won't though. Even though he betrayed you and almost got you killed you won't be able to kill him. You won't be able to kill anyone. The other Fears, even Jack. They're all stupid. You'll never be able to make the key. If they hadn't attacked you you never would have even gotten one. It's hilarious! Well good luck. I'll be sure to be there when you eventually die screaming," she blurted out the whole paragraph in one braying noise of mockery and laughter before turning around and abruptly disappearing.

Lisa was beside me in an instant her hands gripping my shoulder's comfortingly. She whispered comforting words in to my ear, but I didn't hear them. The Liar was right there was no way I could do what The Man in Grey wanted me to do. I had failed. I would probably just let The Fears kill me, but I couldn't do that. I couldn't just let my friends down. If the choice was dying or killing though I'd gladly choose the former and I know Lisa would agree.

I suppose I did mention the dream I had.

It felt like one of my prophetic dreams, but it might have been a Grotesque nightmare masquerading as my dream and I hope it was because the dream was of all my friends abandoning me or betraying me.

My Dreams are getting weird.

Which seems like a strange statement considering the "normal" state of my dreams, but now I seem to just be dreaming about random events that I'm fairly sure are going on as I'm dreaming or at least around that time with occasional strange prophetic dreams.

So as you can probably guess... talking about dreams time.

I had a dream about a meeting. There were puppets, Nests, Timberwolves and Proxies.

Each one seemed to have a representative talking. I saw The Second talking for The Proxies, A random puppet was talking for the puppets, I don't know why Spider Girl wasn't there. Also pretty sure her name was Ariadne. The Nests and Timberwolves though seemed to be on the same side and there were three people talking for them. A man in a heavy black cloak similar in style to those Organization XIII cloaks from Kingdom Hearts, but without the metal parts and it was tied closed with straps of what looked like red tape as opposed to zipped closed. The man's face was invisible in the back of the hood, but his voice seemed to emanate from all around him.

For The Nests there was a guy with short white hair and wearing an immaculate White Suit with a pattern on the back in the shape of wings. I recognized him as Oliver Bough, The Dove.

Lastly standing in front of The Nests and Timberwolves was a figure wearing simple ragged grey clothing. He had a machete in his hand and his face was covered by a white facemask with drawn on blood dripping down from the left eyehole. The eye holes themselves seemed empty. Like there was nothing behind them. I knew who it was, but I also knew that it wasn't him. There was something wrong about him.

The Dove spoke at this point and took my attention.

"This all we got? Why aren't the other Servants pitching in?" he asked angrily.

"The Newborn and The Choir are still mulling over Jack's words and whether they're true or not, EAT says she'll wait and see what happens. The Blind Man is with us, but he claims he doesn't really control The Archive anyway. The Cold Boy says he refuses to help us or Jack and is busy dealing with The Brute, but if the girl is stupid enough to go after him he will kill her, The Snake says it's not her problem and that we don't really need her help and The Unnamed Child and all her servants have disappeared just like they did when we tried to kill Nathan and his crew last time and remember I'm only helping you as long as we make sure that Lisa isn't harmed," The Second explained matter of factly.

"Alright," The Dove stated quietly and then seemed to rally as he found something else to complain about.

"Well what about the doll chick?! Where's she? She should be here!" he argued glaring at the puppet who lowered his head.

"The Mistress wandered off... She does so often... Won't tell us where she goes... Never tells us where she goes... She knows though... Knows everything... Knows if we try to escape... Comes back and hurts us if we do..." the puppet answered before letting out a series of quiet whimpering. The Dove turned away from The Puppet in disgust.

"Well alright then. What's the plan now?" he asked.

The cloaked figure spoke up, "The Grotesque has been slacking off he will be keeping her nights busy again starting tonight and with that-" he was cut off then as suddenly my dream changed and I found myself back in a Grotesque nightmare. So that's a thing again unfortunately as well. Luckily this one didn't last long as I was woken up by Lisa seemingly mere minutes after it started.

Also Sally seems to be adamant about finding some way to make it up to us for running away during the fight. A request to hear her play however was rejected with much apologies as she is apparently very shy of playing in front of others and only really plays when she's alone. She says it makes her feel better when she's feeling sad. She says that she will however repay us in any other way as soon as we come up with one.

Why did this seem like a good idea?

"Hey... Hey... Amanda... I have a confession to make. I might have lied a little. I might have tricked you into coming here under false pretences... Sort of. There was no information about The Man In Grey coming here, but I figured if you showed up here and I made some... interested parties aware you'd be here the resulting disaster that would be caused might draw him here anyway... You don't seem very happy, but hey... It might work and I promise you will not die even if the plan fails. I'll make sure of that... You still don't seem ha-" That somewhat paraphrased quote from Muffin, followed by the sound of a certain woman's fist connecting with his jaw >.>, were the words that began the worst day of my life so far.

So, yeah turns out Muffin is a lying Jerk. Portnoy and Dr. Malice were not aware of this plan, or at least they promise me they weren't. It turns out Muffin had no information regarding a Man In Grey Appearance his plan was to use me as bait to manufacture a disaster that might, keyword: Might, draw The Man in Grey here. He had himself, Portnoy, Dr. Malice, Lisa, Sally and I waiting in a shopping mall. Apparently he didn't believe it would work if there weren't innocents caught in the crossfire. Which made me reject the initial plan immediately and caused him to explain his true plan which of course I couldn't really reject since it was a trick anyway and I'd already fallen for it. He had also informed as many servant groups as he could find that I would be there as well as that he would be there, and apparently killed a whole bunch of people to make sure they'd take an interest in him being there, and on cue shortly after explaining this to me and before I could leave, the place began to explode.

It would seem in fact that someone on The Servant side was a bit smarter than my dear, "loyal and trustworthy" friend Muffin and had, knowing that we'd be there, set up traps in advance. Hidden bombs had been placed in strategic locations throughout the mall. In fact their placement was so strategic that if it wasn't for some quick work by Lisa, Muffin and Portnoy we all would have been instantly killed when the bombs went off. The bombs did not go off all at once and we were fortunate to be standing quite far from the first detonation and instead only saw the explosion go off across the... Atrium I think they're called? I had just enough time to see a piece of shrapnel tear through the arm of a woman and into the chest of her son before Lisa barreled into me and Drove me and Sally to the ground. Portnoy somehow managed to pinpoint the nearest bomb and Muffin grabbed a column, tore it out of place and tossed it in the way of the explosion just as it went off. The support beam took the brunt of the explosion and all of the shrapnel and kept us safe. Muffin was knocked unconscious and suffered some, major for a normal person, but minor for him, injuries. Portnoy was somehow completely unharmed and seemed just as surprised by this fact as we were and Dr. Malice... Well he was decapitated by a piece of shrapnel, but he'd be back of course. As we recovered from the explosion we could hear other survivors. Most of them injured, crying and occasionally screaming. Sally appeared to of lost consciousness as well leaving just Lisa, Portnoy and I still awake and ready when the servants moved in. Two groups entered one from each end of the atrium. It looked like Timberwolves on one end and the others had nothing identifiable about them which was worrisome as it meant they could be any number of different kinds of servant.

Also unfortunately it seemed these two groups had their act together a little more than most and were working together as opposed to the crossfire shootout I had been sort of hoping for as our only reasonable chance to survive this. Both sides seemed to be doing a sweep and we stayed down just watching them. We got up after we saw they were shooting every body they saw in the head to be sure they were dead. Me and Lisa stood up and Portnoy stayed down on the ground at which point those near us immediately turned their attentions on us. Attentions of course also included guns and we turned and tried to flee behind cover as gunshots went off behind us. Upon hiding behind one of the few columns that wasn't torn out of place or too badly damaged. I turned to look at where The Servants were attempting to figure out a plan. At this point I saw that one of the Timberwolves had turned on the others and had killed two of them and was now running through a hail of gunfire as the rest of the Timberwolves opened fire on the traitor. I took this as a sign that Dr. Malice had found a new body and that there were now four of us fighting which was slightly better odds than they were before.

There were about ten of the Timberwolves and about five of the at the time unidentified servants. The Timberwolves were at current busy with Dr. Malice and so the unidentified servants were moving on us now. Two of them stopped near Sally and Portnoy and prepared to execute them. Portnoy acted at this moment rising up in one movement a knife in his hand and gutting the immediately identified servant standing over him. I say immediately identified, because as the knife sliced it's way through the servants body a swarm of blackbirds launched out of the wound and swarmed Portnoy who backed away flailing wildly.

Something somewhat strange happened here. Well two strange things, but one of them was Portnoy strange and the other was a more normal strange. The more normally strange thing is one of the birds seemed to suddenly veer sharply for no adequate reason and collided with the head of The Nest about to execute Sally. This knocked him off balance and his shot instead hit the floor just by her head which seemed to wake her up. She woke with a start, grabbing her didgeridoo case and swinging it at the servants feet sweeping them out from under him and causing him to fall to the ground his gun going off and I swear suddenly twisting so that the shot hit another nest in the head. Sally looked around, holding her didgeridoo case like a weapon. Seemed to realize where she was and bolted, which I can't really blame her for. In the Nests' surprise none of them really tried to stop her and she managed to get away. They were probably also more concerned by the inferno that was Portnoy.

He was holding a short sword now and it was aflame as was his knife and he was slaughtering his way through the birds that were attacking him. The three nests that were still alive however were taking aim and so at last Lisa and I decided to act. Lisa dived out from behind the column we had been hiding behind and tackled one of the Nests at the knees then rolled off of him and delivered a bone breaking kick to the side of another one's knee. This took down two of them, but the last one was going to shoot Portnoy and I couldn't let that happen. I didn't know what else to do so I threw the Pocket Watch at him. I don't know if it was guided or I just got a really lucky shot, but it hit the guy right in the chest and immediately it did the same thing to him as it had to the puppet last time. Within seconds there was nothing left of the guy. His clothes, skin, muscle, bone... all turned to dust. Even his gun seemed to disappear.

At this point The two remaining nests seemed to just stop moving as did The Birds which worked fine for us. Lisa took advantage of their distractions to knock out one and Portnoy decapitated the other, the flaming sword apparently managing to cauterize the wound so the birds couldn't get out. The sounds of gunfire had moved on elsewhere, apparently Dr. Malice had managed to lead the timberwolves out of the atrium to a different part of the mall so we used this chance to escape.

I grabbed the pocketwatch, Lisa and Portnoy grabbed Muffin and we hurried out of the mall. Dr. Malice would be fine and likely catch up with us later.

We didn't find Sally outside, but she showed up at, Lisa and I's current livingspace a few hours later looking ashamed and relieved when we told her no one had been hurt.

So... yeah. I killed another person, Muffin is a lying bastard who almost got us all killed and the absolute worst part out of all of it...

Apparently the stupid plan worked. The mall massacre was on the news later that night and one of the reports was about a survivor who had been hiding and who had spotted a man matching The Man in Grey's description standing on one of the upper floors overlooking The Atrium watching the whole thing.

I ended up risking my life and all my friend's lives to get him to show up so I could talk to him and he actually showed up and I didn't get to talk to him! 

A friend?

Hey everyone.

So few new things. One a friend... Hopefully. Not exactly ready to stop being wary, but we engaged in a bit of heroics and got a new traveling companion out of it. A group of servants. Puppets specifically were hounding some girl. Lisa and I stepped in. Neither of us are killers and I'm not much of a fighter and up until then I didn't believe Lisa was, but it seems one other thing she forgot is that she knew how to fight.

There had only been two puppets and they move kind of stiffly... I'm guessing they weren't willing. So anyway Lisa managed to hold them off, unable to actually put them down obviously since they could continue moving even if unconscious. While she did that I rescued the girl and ran off with her to hide. After seeing that we had made it away Lisa fled the fight and we met up later.

The girl's name is Sally Foret. She's a musician apparently. Plays a really unusual instrument as well. A didgeridoo... Yeah kind of unusual, but pretty cool. She has it in a case that she carries on her back. Apparently the puppets tried to steal it from her. She seems a bit shaken by her encounter with the puppets and so we're letting her accompany us for a bit.

Lisa confirmed she's not a Fear. She seems to be a runner actually as she knew the things that attacked her were puppets. She won't say what Fear she's running from though she confirmed that until today she hadn't really gotten into a fight with puppets before and so it seems she's not running from The Wooden Girl. Most likely The Puppets are just here for us and for some reason Sally just attracted their interest for some reason.

I bet that Spider girl was watching the whole thing. After her last plan failed she probably set that up just to see what we'd do. I'm willing to bet we'll run into her again soon enough. I bet she was what that dream was referring to.

Anyway so after that Lisa and I, with Sally managed to get to the city where Muffin and the others were waiting. Muffin met us in a house he appears to have... acquired through likely dubious means and told us that he has it on good authority that The Man In Grey will be showing up in this town soon and that this might be my one chance to meet him and find out what he wants from me.

Things that have happened.

So it has been a bit of time since I last updated...

Numerous reasons.

Came out of shocked and instead entered a period of horror that left me pretty much unwilling to do anything meaningful. This occurred mid travel to our next destination and Lisa pretty much had to guide me every step of the way as I blundered blindly. I'm still not quite... okay I guess. Every once in a while I'll just flash back to it. I also can't really bring myself to get rid of the pocket watch, but I've kept to keeping it in my pocket and not taking it out. I don't really want to look at it.

The other reason I haven't been able to talk is as I've said we've been on the move again. Our plan is to every few days at random move from one city to another hoping to confound any planned attacks by our enemies.

Anyway stuff has happened since the last post. For one The Grotesque hasn't shown up again and so instead I had another prophetic-ish dream?

I saw the heavenly gates again. This time though I saw myself there. There was something behind the gate now as well. An amorphous being stood behind the gate all I could see of it were eyes, some human, some not and all staring at me. Voices screamed through the gate at me.

"Release Us!" and it sounded like thousands of people speaking in one voice. Then a new voice sounded. It was loud and filled with anger and it simply said:

"There is no God, but I!" and then something hit me in the dream and I woke up.

Lisa also says that with her memories returning certain abilities she had are also returning. Apparently she can sense the presence of Fears which she says should make it harder, if not impossible for any Fear to sneak up on us. So, it's unlikely I'll get caught again like I did with The Liar. As long as Lisa is around anyway.

Lastly got a contact from Muffin. He, Portnoy and Dr. Malice think they found something interesting and want us to come join them when we have time. They told us where to go and so we'll be heading there shortly. So... hopefully that will lead to something useful.

I don't know if you can read this...

... but, I think you might of blown your whole wad on that first night, Grotesque. Last nights torture was... Terrible I'll readily admit that, but I don't think anything as mundane as that is gonna leave as much of an impression as that first night did. Just saying.

It would be somewhat tedious to go into the details of exactly what happened last night in my nightmares and I apologize for forcing you to read through all the details last time. Suffice to say, pain, mutilation and various forms of physical torment were involved.

I woke up in pain and in tears and I am in no way suggesting that this nightly torture has stopped being extremely disturbing and horrifying. Just that the first nightmare was far more traumatizing then this more recent one has been.

Oh right also I killed someone today.

I'm sort of in shock about that in fact and it might be responsible for why I actually feel so calm.

I'll get to it in a moment, but it has made me rethink things. The nature of these recent events have been arguably subtle. Not in terms of their approach obviously. The grotesque purposely introducing itself into my dreams is hardly subtle and a mad man bursting into my bedroom just as I awoke and attempting to strangle me to death is not subtle either. However they have been subtle in that they've left it ambiguous as to why.

It could very well be that these are all related to Jack's threat or that they could be random occurrences. However the chance of two random occurrences that cannot in fact be confirmed as random occurrences and of course the overall coincidental natures of these things has started to make me reverse my decision.

I no longer believe Jack's threat is false. I don't know how, but I'm fairly sure he has found a way to convince some of if not all The Fears to come after me and he instead desires me to believe his threat false. What does this actually change? Not much. As I've said regardless of the verifiability of the threat we have been acting as though the threat was true regardless simply because it was safer to assume so regardless of personal opinions.

I suppose I should tell you about the person I... Neutralized.

Lisa and I sleep in the same bed. Normally we actually don't as we both enjoy lots of room to sleep, however we decided to share a bed as I had hoped that her presence might mitigate the effect of The Grotesque's nightmares. Which unfortunately did not work.

She was awakened by a sound and left the bedroom to check on it at which point she stepped out of the bedroom into what can only be described as a spider web. The moment her body came into contact with the patterned string the string looped around her pulling her tightly against the web which then began to envelope her and apparently attached her to the ceiling fully bound to the point where she couldn't move at all. She did not see anything that happened after her binding, so I'm not sure if anything happened in the interim, but after that I woke up from my nightmares to find a crazed looking man standing at the foot of the bed. He was swaying drunkenly and at first I wasn't sure I had awoken from my nightmares at all. He pounced onto the bed standing and brought his fists upwards as he stood over me. I felt something incredibly thin and soft slide around my throat and then abruptly tighten and pull my head upwards. I tried to scream, but the string was tight enough around my throat to make it impossible. In fact a later examination would find that the string had been tight enough to of started to cut into the flesh leaving a thin bloody line around my neck. I tried to grab at the string, but the part around my neck was too tight to grasp and the parts of it that must have been attached to his hands were so thin as to be invisible and my desperate hands failed to contact them at all. With my other hand I desperately struck with the object I was holding.

Which happened to be the watch. It struck the side of his head and probably would have done nothing if it was an ordinary pocket watch. However, in this case when it struck him it was like all the lights went out of the world. It was like being back in The Grotesque's world of nightmares. Everything was pitch black and yet I could plainly see. The string wrapped around my neck disappeared and I could see it turn to ash in his hands as did all the rest of the strings wrapped around his body. His flesh began to I don't even know... It was like it was cracking and turning into dust and then there was a sound like fluttering wings and then well his skin just all turned to dust and his muscles and organs. There was just a skull and then the pocket watch fell to the floor and the completely clean skeleton of the man I murdered fell on me. I immediately of course shoved it off of me, grabbed the pocket watch and rushed out of the room. In the other room I found someone else. It was a woman in a a red and black dress with a spiderweb motif. She held in her hand a staff topped with a roll of thread that seemed to be constantly moving and fidgeting. A single thread led from the staff to the cocooned Lisa. A spider was slowly crawling across the thread and The woman looked at me with what can only be described as irritation. I had seen her before. In the other universe Muffin had met her... He had killed her indirectly while she was in a delusional state brought on by Dreslith's power. I let the pocket watch fall from my hand and instead merely grabbed onto the chain beginning to spin it in my hand.

"Do you know what happened to the puppet you sent in to kill me?" I asked spinning the pocket watch.

She nodded though she didn't really seem afraid or even interested in me.

"Want the same to happen to you?" I asked trying to seem threatening despite the fact I was still actually stunned and terrified by what had just happened and I don't think I actually would have had the guts to do it purposely. She gave a small shrug in response anyway and tugged on her staff. The thread detached from the cocoon and seemed to shoot back into the end of the staff dragging the spider with it. She then turned and casually walked out.

I remained standing there for a bit then fell to my knees and retched for a bit though I didn't actually throw up. Shortly after I decided to check the cocoon and managed to free Lisa. Apparently she had been suffocating in there which makes me wonder what the point of the spider was. If she was going to die of asphyxiation anyway why bother sending a spider? I imagine they're poisonous or something, but who knows. That woman is a strange one and having only ever seen her in the delusional state I don't actually know anything about her

Lisa has been resting and I think the shock is starting to wear off. My hands are trembling... I think I'm going to go see how she's doing.

Nightmares again... but more so.

I may have been a bit... what's the word... Putting something or using something that would better of been used later on?

Hasty?

Is that what I'm thinking of?

Whatever...

I may have been a bit hasty in naming the last post nightmares.

It would probably be more accurately called dreams or something else entirely. This post far more deserves the title nightmares. I don't think I can consider this proof of Jack's threat, but I seem to have definitely gotten the attention of one of The Fears.

Last night I started having another set of weird symbolic, possibly prophetic dreams. The only one I remember was a brief glimpse of the clock faced me facing off against that same faceless man marked by the red hand that stabbed Lisa. Immediately after that an effect occurred in my dreams. You know in movies when like the film reel seems to burn up and the scene just slowly falls apart, blurring around large blank holes appearing in it? Yeah that happened and then I was strapped into a chair. From the pain in my body it seemed to be one of those old torture chairs. The ones with spikes on the arm rest and on the seat and leg rests and pretty much just anywhere where your body touched the chair. I could feel pain all over my body as the spikes sank into my skin. A voice was speaking in rich lyrical tones as I struggled to free myself from the chair to no avail and simply causing the pain to worsen.

"Apologies my dear, can't have you seeing what's to come. That wouldn't be fair so I'll be occupying your nights from now on," the voice spoke and then a hand grabbed my head from behind and tipped it back in a way that probably would have broken my neck in the real world... also come to think of it probably should have pulled my head through the back of the chair...

There was a creature standing behind me. It looked like a furry humanoid creature with bat like wings. It's hands were clawed and blood seemed to drip from the clawed hand clutching my face. It was only after the pain settled in that I noticed it's hand wasn't bleeding, its claws were stabbing into my face. I screamed and thrashed and then all the pain disappeared and I was sitting in a metal fold out chair. A small pool of blood formed beneath the chair dripping out from the wounds that remained on my body despite the cessation of pain.

"There is so much fun we can have in your sleep. I could simply continue hurting you or I could show you our visions of your future. Would you like that? Oh I know let me show you the end we have planned for you,"

I was again in a different place. I was strapped now to a new chair... Well actually an old chair.

It was the chair The archive put me in that allowed them to measure my brain or whatever and confirm my dreams. I wasn't strapped down then, but I was now. It was also a different room. The one the archive had had been clinical, but had felt still like a safe place. This one seemed like a room in an insane asylum that had been out of order for years after the patients had rioted and killed all the abusive staff. The walls were stained and grey and above all old. There was a rusty metal door that swung open admitting an elderly man. I knew him immediately on sight.It was the fear known as The Blind Man. Now I should probably state that while probably even at the time I knew it was all a dream there was definitely a part of myself that didn't grasp that. All the pain I had been feeling and everything that was happening to me felt real and for the most part I believed was real. I was terrified, I thought I was dying. Really if you've had a nightmare and remembered the feeling you felt when you didn't realize it was a nightmare that's how all this felt.

So, The Blind Man entered and I began to panic and scream and beg him not to kill me. The other voice spoke in my head at this point. "Don't worry we won't kill you, We don't have any reason to want you dead. It's so much more fun to keep you alive and torture you continuously," it said and then The Blind Man moved behind me and his bone thin, wrinkled hands grabbed my head. There was a sudden dull throbbing in my head that made me gnash my teeth and squirm and then things began to appear in front of me. Places, events, people. All things from my life. My friends, my home, my history... and then one by one it vanished. I could feel my memories being erased. I couldn't remember them once they vanished, but I could feel their loss. I could feel them missing. Tears streamed from my eyes even as I forgot why I was crying.  Soon I began to forget things I had learned and eventually I slumped in the chair my mind completely cleared of every memory, but how to breath and the other things necessary to continue living.

Again I feel the need to explain. Obviously if my memories were erased until I was essentially a blank slate how do I know any of this. Well because it was a nightmare none of it really happened and so while in one sense I felt and knew my memories were being erased there was another part of me that knew it was all fake and still had all my memories. It was like there were two of me. One in the chair and the other watching what was happening to the other me.

I was left alone then in the room. Just sitting in the chair not caring, or feeling until night fell and I slowly drifted into sleep. At which point I had like a dream within a dream which I guess is possible when The Grotesque does it? I had a dream wherein I relived my entire life rebuilding all the memories taken from me right up until the moment they were taken from me. I woke up with my memories restored and with the full knowledge of what was about to happen. The Blind Man was back and having my memories erased and my mind reduced to a vegetable was much worse the second time because I knew it would happen and I also knew it was going to happen again and again.

It was here I woke up for real. I remained lying there crying and fearful and my entire body hurt where the spikes had stuck into me and where The Grotesque's claws has stabbed into my face. There were no physical injuries though. I told Lisa about it and her attempts to comfort me where useful, but I feel terrible now still... I don't want to go back to sleep, but I know what happens if you try to remain awake.

I started writing this around 6:00 PM and had to stop and cuddle with Lisa quite a few times while attempting to write it. It's 9:00 PM here now...

I'm gonna have to go to sleep soon...

Nightmares

I feel I may have neglected you for the last little while, but I've been busy with running, explaining things to friends, planning things with friends and myself, obsessing over the Pocket watch and thinking.

Not much has changed since my last post in terms of my situation. Lisa is still with me and is now caught up on what Jack told me. Muffin, Portnoy and Dr. Malice are now also aware, but I'm still on my own on that front as they appear to have their own plans to deal with this. I've been constantly on the move. Lisa is surprisingly adept at finding places to live, food and other useful materials while on the run. My guess is it's a result of the memories that are still returning to her. So, doing pretty well on the whole now being a runner thing. I'd probably be dead in a day without her... So hopefully nothing happens to her.

As I said though I've been thinking and I think Jack's threat, might have been a bit... er bluffy? Is that a word?

Yeah according to my dreams of that other universe Jack created The Fears, but there's nothing to suggest they actually work for him directly so, I'm not sure I buy that he can just set them after me. If anything they've shown a rather rebellious attitude towards him historically. I mean they didn't really know their own origins until Muffin told them about it, but even so they've always seemed to treat Jack as at best a necessary evil to associate with at times and at worst an enemy to be shunned and hated. I don't see them coming after me just because Jack told them to and I see them coming after me even less so if he tells them that the reason they should come after me is because I might be a danger to him.

If anything most of them would be happy to help me take him down a peg... however I'm supposed to do that...

Still... If Jack told me they'd come after me he must of had a reason for it... It's occurred to me the entire thing might have been a lie, but even then I don't think Jack would tell me all of that for literally no reason. He has to of had some intention in telling me these things. So... It's best to remain cautious no matter what.

Also while I am still mostly convinced that Jack's threat is a lie it is definitely true that something is taking an interest in me. Lisa goes out on occasion in each town we stay at. Mostly to procure things and just find out about anything useful in the surrounding area and recently she's reported lots of sightings of things of a... abnormal nature. Things of and relating to The Fears. Occasionally servants or servant activities or unusually large numbers of runners. Things that would suggest some kind of event starting to take place.

Omens I suppose you could say.

We're keeping an eye on it and I'm not stupid enough to assume that I'm automatically right... anymore...

Right so I'm not assuming that I'm right. We're going on the safer assumption that Jack was telling the truth, however unlikely it seems, and reacting with proper levels of paranoia.

I'm also keeping the Pocketwatch nearby at all times... Strangely enough it seems to have an effect on my dreams if I fall asleep while holding it. The effect being most often that I no longer have any dreams.

However on one occasion and only one so far. I had a dream that was different from most others. Normally I dream of things that occurred in the past. Recently my dreams have gotten closer to events that took place in the very recent past such as my meeting with Lisa. However only since I've gotten the pocketwatch and begun sleeping with it in hand have I had any dreams of the present or possibly future.

It was more symbolic than usual even and also was not a seamless sequence of events like usual.

It was more like snippets of events.

A man cloaked in flames who I'm pretty sure was Harold setting fire to a building made out of ice.

A room filled with spiderwebs and a woman wrapped in strings who smiled at me and then... well burst open to reveal a large humanoid spider...

A massive stone maze in the center of which the minotaur howled and held up a bloodied mask.

and lastly a static scene of what looked like the classical image of heaven, but the gates were locked up with chains that had locks on them. Each lock had no keyhole, but instead had a symbol on it. I recognized some of the symbols, The Twin Triangles, The Stick and The Serpent, The Operator Symbol... You know The Fear symbols. I assume they were all the symbols of the fears.

You might wonder how do I know these are from the present or future... Well I don't... Mostly it's just a feeling however I'm pretty sure the feeling is correct as one of them most likely happened the same night I had the dream. The next morning there was a news report about a museum being burned to the ground. Lisa confirmed that The Museum was a location known to be used by The Children of The Cold. As well the police were looking for someone matching Harold's description who had been seen entering the building shortly before it burned down.

So, call it a hunch, but that one at least was probably dreaming of the present. The rest I don't know about... But it feels like they're also something that was happening at the time or something that was going to happen soon.